Browsed by
Tag: reflections

My degree was not a waste of time because I choose to stay at home

My degree was not a waste of time because I choose to stay at home

This article originally appeared here.

 

  

     

   

 

 

 

 

Why We All Decided To Sleep In The Same Room During My Confinement

Why We All Decided To Sleep In The Same Room During My Confinement

I’ve been getting quite a lot of hits on my other post about confinement lady sleeping arrangements at night, and thought that it would be a good idea to expand on why I went with Option C ie my confinement lady (CL) sleeping in the same room as hubby, baby and I.

On hindsight, I really have no regrets with this arrangement. Let me share with you why:

I was able to sleep in the same room as my newborn

To me this is extremely important because I have just delivered my baby and want to spend time with my newborn. And yes this includes night time!

Yes you need rest but you need to be able to see your baby too without walking too far. It’s an emotional thing!

It’s also important vice versa as your baby will most likely be able to smell your milk and feel comforted at the same time.

My newborn had a constant environment at night

He was either sleeping in his cot, feeding on my bed or being pat to sleep in the same room.

He wasn’t being transferred from one room to another.

Perhaps one room was colder and another warmer. Perhaps one had air conditioner on and another didn’t. Perhaps both rooms had the lights offed but the hallway’s light was very bright.

Any change in environment can be off-putting and distracting to a baby still getting used to living outside the womb, especially at night time.

I was able to cope after my CL left

Because I slept with my newborn throughout my confinement I was able to pick up on his subtle cues on feeding, changing etc.

For example, for the first few weeks he required to be fed, then burped, then fed again, followed by a change in diapers, followed by another burp before being pat to sleep.

It made me know what to expect at night and I did not feel at all overwhelmed once my CL left. Win!!

And now, let’s get some of your concerns out of the way! These were my initial worries too but in the end none of them mattered!

What if my working husband’s sleep is disturbed by our baby’s cries?

Men are generally (not all) not light sleepers. Imagine a couple sleeping in the same room as their newborn baby – most of the time the mom will be the one who wakes up and feed the baby while the dad just sleeps on.

He may help if he wants but if he’s got to work the next day, maybe not 😉 That’s why you hired help in the first place!

So try it for a few nights – chances are he might not even stir if you and your CL have it all under control and manage to sort out your newborn before he/she starts wailing.

I want my privacy!

After birthing a baby, your modesty and privacy will be thrown out of the window.

And I don’t mean it in a bad way. You just don’t bother as much, as the most important thing is making sure that your baby gets fed in the easiest and most convenient method possible.

We want our privacy!

This may be a personal preference but seriously? After giving birth to a newborn, there is no time nor energy to do any hanky panky stuff. I was trying to heal myself and had to minimise movement let alone do anything that requires energy.

The most important thing is that we get enough sleep, and baby gets fed/changed/soothed to sleep.

We can’t fit so many people in the room!

We barely made it too! Thankfully my CL is rather simple and did not mind sleeping on our Sealy mattress placed on the ground.

This made it easier to move during the day so that it doesn’t take up too much space and clog up the whole bedroom.

Our sleeping configuration was like this: hubby and I on our Queen bed, baby in his cot next to our bed, CL on the mattress at the foot of our bed.

IN SUMMARY

I am really glad we had a good confinement experience, particularly at night.

I tried sleeping with my newborn separate from the CL on the first day after coming back from the hospital, and boy that was a grave mistake!

I had to carry my lil’ boy all by myself, change him, put him back to sleep. All while trying to recover “down there”!

It was only one night before I decided to use the help we hired. I let go of my ego, my stubbornness and let others help me – and this made all the difference.

However, what works for one might not work for another. As mentioned in my previous post, it really is up to you, the mother of your child, to decide how you want the setup to be.

I hope your confinement will be a great experience too!

Your baby is only newborn once, so appreciate the moment and embrace the hourly night calls 😉

Till next time! xoxo

The Story of A Dark Red Orchid – Project Love Day 31/365

The Story of A Dark Red Orchid – Project Love Day 31/365

So I wanted to share something which happened a few days ago:

I have been mindfully practicing The Law of Attraction since the New Year.

What is it?

In the New Thought philosophy, the law of attraction is the belief that by focusing on positive or negative thoughts people can bring positive or negative experiences into their life.

The book “The Secret” was all the craze when it was launched many years ago – I missed out on that craze and remembered dismissing it.

The idea behind it is:

Thought becomes things. If you see it in your mind, you will hold it in your hand. What you feel is what you will attract.

Nonsense!! Or so I thought 😂

By fate I was touched by it. I was in a bookshop and the sequel to The Secret, called The Power was on sale. As someone who is usually open and love a bargain, I bought it.

Subsequently, I reconnected with a dead friend whom I have not seen in ages. Coincidentally, he was a believer too and passed me the movie!

In the short movie someone said, “Think about something unusual. If it happens then you know it’s working.”

“It could be as simple as thinking about a long lost friend you want to speak to – that person will appear in your life”

For me, I chose to see a dark red orchid.

Now, this was before I even knew that such a thing existed. I just imagined the colour because I like it!

This is what normally comes to mind when one mentions the flower.

I’ve seen white or purple orchids, but never dark red ones.

nd guess what I saw in less than a month?

Hahaha!!! A dark red orchid!!!! A fake one nonetheless but it blew my mind!

Now, I am at a point of my life where I am pretty happy and contented.

I have a loving family, loving husband, a pretty cooperative baby, a nice house to live in, financially stable…

I used to think “Don’t expect too much, hence you won’t be disappointed”.

But then realised that this is a very limiting way of thinking.

My life is good, but I know that it will be 100% better after this!

Till next time! xoxo

Project Love 14/354

Project Love 14/354

Oops I skipped two days there lol!

I am grateful to spend the Sunday with my grandmother today. She is 85 years old and still going strong!

We took a picture where there was Edric, myself, my dad and my grandmother – a total of 4 generations! Isn’t that amazing?

At dinner today I noticed a particular young waiter was playing with Edric by smiling at him and making funny faces.

This made me realise that my lil boy is actually a friendly soul and can make almost anyone smile at him!

I get to reap the benefits while looking after him as well as people are usually more kind, friendly and happy when they see him lol!

Just saw a training video which is so inspiring!

The gist of it was saying that to be successful, it’s not just about your goals, but understanding and be honest with yourself.

We often blame others (person, circumstances) or give excuses when we are not successful, but it is ultimately we ourselves who are responsible for our own success.

Project Love 11/365

Project Love 11/365

Today, I woke up to my son waking up. He usually stirs and moans a bit before opening his eyes.

And then I sing his morning song, which goes like this:

Good morning, good morning,

How are you?

Good morning, my little one,

How do you do?

I can’t wait for the day to begin

When I see your cheeky grin

You look so cute with your eyes and hair

Do you know how much I care?

And he always smiles when he hears this. It warms me inside out.

Project Love 10/365

Project Love 10/365

Today started out great!

I am grateful that I had the opportunity to go to the gym and completed not one, but TWO classes. My two most favourite group fitness classes as well – BodyCombat and BodyPump.

The last time I was able to do two classes back to back was probably 3 years ago. #personalwin #littlemilestone

I am just grateful that I am able to walk freely, to be healthy enough to exercise, to enjoy working out. To feel comfortable in my own skin. I know not everyone feels that way.

I came back to my son who was looking for me. My heart was filled with love when I saw him then! Ahhh, I’m one lucky mama 😍

Had another two social appointments which was a joy! They both reinforced my view of #thelawofattraction.

If you think positive thoughts, you get positive outcomes. If you do good, you receive good. Positive attracts positive. Negative attracts negative.

My son received his Christmas present today, three pretty jumpsuits and bibs.

I sometimes feel like Edric gets so much love, and I am so happy that he attracts so much generosity and goodness in the people around him. He emits it too I know.

That makes me love him even more each day. And I know that if he grows up with love, he will be a fine young gentleman 😉

Project Love 9/365

Project Love 9/365

I am grateful for being able to wake up late today! I set my alarm for 7.30am, totally did NOT hear it and woke up at 11am.

Not sure if I can get back to working life as have been spoilt with the luxury of time just for Edric and myself.

I am grateful that my family employed a helper at home, and she helped mind Edric today while I get a break to do my own things.

I met up with two groups of friends yesterday.

One my childhood friend who will be joining us in Adelaide very soon. Yay I will have another friend in this undiscovered city I am now proud to call home.

The second group are my hubby’s friends who were all really happy to see Edric. They kept commenting how well behaved he was! This is true and I always feel blessed for that 🙂

Project Love 8/365

Project Love 8/365

OMG I have an amazing story to share:

So I’m meeting a couple friend for lunch at a particular restaurant at shopping mall today.

I have lots to carry (baby, baby seat, baby bag, handbag and a big bag of clothes for donation. I’m crazy like that lol!) so I needed to park at this particular area which is closest to both the restaurant and donation place.

I would round and round and can usually get one – but in this case I NEEDED it to be in one particular small area. I’m not the person who usually wait for parking, but decided to.

Stopped somewhere close to (but not) the area I needed to park for 7 mins – nothing. But I wasn’t worried, I had time, I believed.

Then for some unknown reason, I decided to start rounding that area and GUESS WHAT, a guy was leaving and the spot was the closest to the entrance!

One may think it’s a coincidence, but to me it’s a #parkingwin with #thelawofattraction 🤗

Ok time for lunch!

Project Love 7/365

Project Love 7/365

I am grateful to be given another day!

Woke up at 7.45am today which is really early by my standard. Felt so much more productive and got some stuff done!

Then Edric decided to wake up early too and wanted to feed.

I think direct latching to feed your baby must be one of the most satisfying feeling one can get. So grateful that I have the opportunity to do this all day everyday!

They just look so adorable sucking away. It’s amazing how feeding comes so naturally to babies.

My boy likes drinking with his hands on his face and eyes closed which is super cute to look at! Proud mom here hehe.

And because I was an early bird today I managed to catch up with some people before Edric woke up.

Never really considered myself a social person but have recently discovered how important it is to have social connections as it makes you happier!

Project Love 6/365

Project Love 6/365

I am so pumped up because I managed to go for BodyCombat this morning! Working out never felt so good!

I just had to close one eye and left baby with my parents and helper.

This mama’s gotta keep fit yo.

I love going for classes at the gym because:

1) You work harder (absorbing energy from other people in the class)

2) You work longer (for the entire class duration, usually 1 hour)

3) Time flies

I woke up to birds chirping again, love this! Sometimes I’d imagine the birds happily chatting amongst themselves.

Edric is a champ today! Smiling and laughing when I met a couple friend for lunch. We chatted and before I realised, 3 hours had passed. It’s always good to catch up with friends!

Rushed to my in laws place – was late but they were still happy to see Edric. He was still smiley (with some small unhappy bouts) and this made them happy. Which made me happy!